


Silent prayer

by Muutus



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Kang Euigeon is Kang Daniel, M/M, RPS - Freeform, WARNING: DISTURBING, Yoon Byeong ok is Yoon Jisung, i crossed the line here, nielsung
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2019-04-14 00:25:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14124129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Muutus/pseuds/Muutus
Summary: OKAY GUYS WARNING. I CROSSED THE LINE HERE. DON’T READ IF YOURE NOT A NIELSUNG SHIPPER, HECK EVEN THE NIELSUNG SHIPPERS MAY FIND THIS CRAZY. BUT THIS IS ALL FICTION. NOTHING TRUE OKAY? I JUST WEBBED THE BLURRED LINES OF REALITY. ITS NOT NSFW OR EXPLICIT AT ALL BUT THIS IS ALARMING OKAY? DON’T SAY I DIDN’T WARN YOU. DANIEL AND JISUNG’S STANS BE WARNED.





	Silent prayer

**Author's Note:**

> AGAIN, I REPEAT, THIS IS ALARMING AND WAS ALL A FICTION.  
> Kang Daniel was Kang Euigeon. Yoon Jisung was Yoon Byeong ok  
> Unbetaed.

___________________

 

Euigeon thought he was straight at first. He thought he loves girls like the norm. It did not matter at that time because he was more focus on wanting to dance, to learn and to grow. There was some time he thought he wont grow up and be a man, a man who has love as his priority. Dancing was more fun and he was happy while doing it.

Euigeon didn’t really paid attention to the gender, or more like he respects them and accepts them as who they are. He had girl crushes and boy crushes, he had mutuals but never really drove himself in. He thought he would never enter on a relationship, but then his heart was caught and he tried to court the apple of his eye. He eventually succeeded and promised to give all the love he has. He had that girlfriend but it didn’t work out as she finds his affection was over the top. It hurted Euigeon, even if they didn’t last long, he knew he loved her. He wasn’t bitter, but he didn’t want to remember and reminiscent their good old times. He was back to square one on focusing on dancing. That may be he can be an idol, and drown himself into the complicated choreography.

He moved to the city, he applied to a small company and entered himself as a trainee. The company wasn’t big. There are only a few trainees, and as usual many of them were doing a part time job so just about three trainees greeted and welcomed him. Well at least it had a practice room available for anyone, he thought as one of the trainees was tasked on touring him around the building. He still didn’t have a dorm or anywhere to live in so the company let him stay on the building at that night and he can search for available place tomorrow. It was hard, but he didn’t let negativity get to him. 

He slept in the practice room and despite the hard and cold floor, he slept soundly. He didn’t know if it was morning already or what because he was startled by a man shaking him from his sleep. He opened his eyes and he blinked twice, he didn’t tear his stare to the face of the handsome man he didn’t know. The mole on the upper eyelid of the man captured his attention.  
“Hey, are you alright?” The man said

Euigeon sat up and answered “I’m okay, yeah.” He tried to wash his face with his dry hands; he rubbed it like it would make his face cleaner.

The man stared to him and Euigeon just stared back too. Euigeon snapped out of it when he realized that he forgot to introduce himself. “I’m—I’m Kang Euigeon.” He retracted his hands again when he remembered that he just rubbed his face with it.

“I’m sorry, I just used it to my face and I offered—you—uhh—I’m sorry again” Euigeon said getting a bit flustered

The man laughed a bit “Are you from busan? That—oh no I didn’t mean to judge at all—uhh I mean” The man got flustered too and it leads them to laugh at their attempt for having a conversation

“I’m Yoon Byeong ok.” The man introduced himself

Euigeon said ‘oh’ and the conversation just died there. He wants to converse with the man but theres this sudden lag at his mind that made him not speak anything coherent so he just shut his mouth. Byeong ok didn’t speak anything too and just stared at him with a tight smile. He smiled back but he didn’t know what to do next.

“Uhh.. do you want jellies?” Byeong ok asked

“Sure—, sure I love jellies.” Euigeon said as his face brightens, he didn’t expected to be offered by his favourite snack

“Oh wait. I’ll get it on my bag.” Byeong ok said as he approached the wall where his bag was lying. Euigeon took that as a cue to stood up on his feet.

Byeong ok brought a whole pack of jellies with him and Euigeon stared at delight. “Here, we can snack on it for breakfast.” 

“Thanks uhh..” Euigeon paused

Euigeon then learned that the man was older than him so he called him hyung. He didn’t look like old though; his handsome face was making him younger. Byeong ok asked him questions and he did the same so they learn a bit about each other. Euigeon then later knew that his hyung was looking for another place to stay in because his place was full of flies and he cant take it anymore. He said that he’s also looking for one and they ended up deciding to room together and will hunt a place on the afternoon.

 

__________________

 

Its about six months after Euigeon arrived to the city. He was waiting on their room because its his hyung’s payday and that means he’ll buy him a pack of jellies again. Euigeon surfed the net as he had nothing to do, it was his rest day from his part time job. The afternoon was long and his hyung will arrive later around six, when he got tired on browsing videos on the net and a little bit of gaming, he decided to sleep.

It was eight when he woke up. And there is no sign of his hyung yet. He opened his phone to check the messages and saw that nothing was new, he then texted his hyung. Another hour and his hyung wasn’t replying. He decided to call him instead. He wasn’t answering his phone. Daniel didn’t know what to do next, if he should report or something. He paced through their room. It was quarter to ten when he decided to go out and look for his hyung maybe but he got shocked the moment he opened his door. It was Jinwoo with a man who looked and smelled drunk barely holding on to his shoulder.

“Oh, nice timing, get this man off—“ Jinwoo was interrupted when the drunk man suddenly kissed him “Oh shit, its just one time I wasn’t looking, you drunkass.” Jinwoo put off Byeong ok from his shoulder and gently pushed him towards Euigeon’s arms. Euigeon caught his hyung as he tried to stood and not lose his balance.

“Take care of your roommate, bye. Oh and beware of steals.” Jinwoo said as he walked out from their room

Euigeon was speechless. A moment passed before he dragged Jisung inside and locked their door, he then lifted up his hyung to place him in his own bed.

“Hyung? Are you alright? Did something bad happened?” Euigeon said as he shake his hyung

Byeong ok woke up and opened his eyes for a bit. He stared to Euigeon and then he suddenly pulled himself up to kiss him. 

“Its because of you.” Byeok ok said and he then lied down and closed his eyes again

Euigeon was frozen on his spot. His mouth was slightly agape and he slowly covered it with his hands while his eyes not leaving the sleeping figure. It made his heart skip a beat. He attempted to calm himself down and make himself remember that his hyung was drunk dead.

He stood up after a while as he get damp towel and readied a bowl beside his hyung’s bed. He sat on the bed beside his hyung as he took his hyung’s shirt off. He didn’t know why his heart was hammering. Byeong ok shifted to lie sideward and then Euigeon saw how sexy was his hyung’s side. He pushed him to lie on his back again and started to wipe his hyung’s body. He caught himself exhaling heavily a few more times because he unconsciously held his breath while attending to his hyung’s needs. He then get a new shirt and dressed up his hyung again.

Euigeon get back to his bed and he leaned on the wall. His hyung was beautiful, he already know that. He was handsome and sexy, nothing new. Byeong ok frowned in his sleep and faced towards his direction. His hyung is also cute when he sulked and frowns like that. It makes Euigeon want to— He stood up and finished the remaining liquid on the water bottle near his bed. He went to the bathroom before he settled to sleep.

 

_________________

 

Three more months passed.

“Its okay, you’ll find a better part time job than that store. Cheer up okay? Hyung will treat you.” Byeong ok said as he comforted Taewoong on the front of their table

Euigeon quietly drank his juice while waiting for their order. He watched how his hyung patted Taewoong’s head. His Byeong ok hyung was kind too. He always uplifts the others and also him when there was time he was down. Its not the first time Euigeon witnessed this kind of scene. In fact its many times already that its making his stomach churn for some bad taste lingering on his mouth. He didn’t react openly anyway.

He knew his reflexes was fast, especially when his eyes was accustomed on how his hyung moves or react, sometimes he didn’t need to look because he knew what is it that would be present to his hyung’s face. It helped him calm down and know when to look away if he knew he was starting to get jealous. When its too much though, he cant help but not tear away his stare to the act and let his own eyes bleed with insecurity. Euigeon was not an open book, but he was usually cheerful, so when his face suddenly contorted on blank or there was this small twitches of his face or his head and body, he knew he wasn’t containing it right. Turning to observe his hyung in his peripheral vision for less tension.

Its not like theyre dating or something. Sometimes he’s getting signs that it was mutual but he didn’t push the issue to the front. He thought he could take more.

It was the same day, that night when Euigeon confronted his hyung.

“Hyung, do you like Taewoong-hyung?” Euigeon asked

Byeong ok stared to him for a while before answering “Well yeah.. ofcourse?”

“Do you love him?” Euigeon asked

Byeong ok stopped watching through his phone and looked to Euigeon on the other side of the bed. “Love? As in real love? I’m bi but I don’t really see him in that way.. he’s my precious friend.”

Euigeon exhaled. “Hyung, you’re bisexual?” He asked with a bit of frown

“Y-yeah.. you didn’t know? Yeah ofcourse, don’t worry—I’m not—to you—“ Byeong ok replied as he averted his gaze and looked down to his hands playing with his own fingers, phone discarded near it.

“I like you hyung.” Euigeon said and Byeong ok lifted his head to stare to his eyes again

“Well i—like you too.” Byeong ok said as he averted his eyes for a bit and then stared back to Euigeon again

“I love you hyung.” Euigeon said not tearing his stare away. His hyung didn’t move after what he said

“What.. do you mean by love..?” and drowned himself in the younger’s gaze

“If I knew you were bisexual then I should have confessed way back.” Euigeon said

Disbelief was present on Byeong ok’s face as he stared to Euigeon. “Don’t—don’t prank me.” He said as he wiped a bit of tears

“I’m serious hyung.” Euigeon said but his hyung was just covering his face with his hands as he leaned his head down.

“Hyung.” Euigeon said again and his hyung peeked a bit as he lowers his fingers on his face

“Go out with me, hyung.” Euigeon said

 

_____________________

 

When Euigeon said ‘going out’, that means dating. And dating nowadays include sex. Yes he has lusted for his hyung, like his eyes, lips, nose and hand. There are many times he got off from that but actual sex is vague from his mind. He searched for it in the internet. 

There was some throwing and screams in the middle of the night. Euigeon didn’t know what he got stumbled into. He lost himself for a moment.

Its not like he was backing out. He was just shocked but he still wanted them to have sex. Even if it includes lubes and anal; new words he learned that was added on his dysfunctional vocabulary. There was also this word ‘fingering’ which was needed to do to prepare whoever was bottoming. 

He froze at the last word.

Who’d bottom from them?

He thinks deeply at that moment. He groaned as he realized it’d be him. Byeong ok is his hyung, he’s the one older so, if there’s someone gonna top from them then its got to be his hyung. He sigh as he learned new more word like prostate with different explanation. That night, he did the new things he learned to himself, its far before he got himself accustomed to it but he managed. He did it a few more times before he told his hyung that he wants to have sex later in that week.

The day which they both agreed come. They go to a secluded motel and stayed for the night. Or so what it looked like, because theyre not there just to stay. Their conversation got stuttered as they goes to showering, like who’d go first or if they would bath together. They decided not to and Euigeon goes first. They already took a bath from their dorm but never minded it and decided to do a quick shower. After that quick shower, Euigeon prepared and fingered himself to make himself accustomed to something bigger that would go inside later. He didn’t know how long he has been inside the bathroom. He goes out of the bath squirming, clueless Byeong ok just smiled at him and take his turn at showering. Euigeon slumped at the bed as he nervously waits for his hyung to finish.

Byeong ok finished long for about half an hour and goes out of the bath with wearing only bathrobe like Euigeon does.

What Euigeon didn’t expected was that a wet, damp and gorgeous Byeong ok would attack his senses right there. His hyung came close and Euigeon smelled the fragrance of his shampoo. His hyung sat beside him and looked to him like he was asking a question, he roamed his eyes to him before he smiled. Intoxicatingly smiled. Euigeon stared to his face, down to his neck and to his half exposed chest. Euigeon swallowed.

He slowly pulled his hyung upward and placed him down the bed. He sated his eyes as he stared to all of Byeong ok once again. He untied the knot of his hyung’s bathrobe and basked himself to the scenery of his nude lover. His hyung was a bit flushed and both his arms beside his head didn’t know where to clutch.

“Hyung, let me fuck you.. Let me top, hyung.” Euigeon pleaded as his voice cracked right there

“Oh God, Why are you stating the obvious? I knew you would.” Byeong ok said and snuggled as if he could hide his face from Euigeon’s hands on his cheeks.

Euigeon couldn’t help but chuckle from the words he just heard. His chuckles turned to smirk. 

“Oh, you knew hyung? Because I didn’t realized until I saw you goes out of that bathroom.” Euigeon said as he took off his own bathrobe

“Just shut up and start.” Byeong ok said as the flush crept to his ears

 

___________________________

 

It’s been four months after Euigeon confessed. He and his hyung were on the rooftop gazing on the night sky, isolated from their friends from the room below. They were invited to drink on this planned occasion. They vouched paying for it. It was supposed to be a celebration of Byeong ok’s nearing graduation and a supposed long last awaited debut. Something happened again that scrapped Byeong ok’s debut. This is the third time from what his hyung said, but he didn’t cry. Two bottles of empty soju lying on their side.

“Euigeonie I think.. I should give up my dream to become an idol.” Byeong ok said as he shifted his head on Euigeon’s lap to stare at him

“What? No way Yoon Byeong ok. Don’t leave me, we’re gonna debut together.” Euigeon said as he pinched his hyung’s cheeks. He actually already dropped calling him hyung as they are now lovers.

“Its time.. I’m this old already, my baby.” Byeong ok said

“Then what about me? Are you giving me up too?” Euigeon said as he covered Byeong ok’s lips with his hands like he didn’t want him to answer

“Youre still young.. I think you should pursue your dream and I believe that you will succeed.” Byeong ok said after he managed to put off Euigeon’s hands

Euigeon stared to Byeong ok with grief and disbelief in his eyes. 

“Hyung, please, I don’t want this relationship to end.” Euigeon said. The times where he called Byeong ok as ‘hyung’ was rare nowadays and would be mostly replaced by sweetie. If Euigeon said ‘hyung’ then that means he was pleading.

“What, youre gonna continue it till we grow old?” Byeong ok said as he sat up from lying on Euigeon’s lap

“Ofcourse, I would marry you if I could.” Euigeon said with a tone of pain and sulking

Byeong ok laughed loudly. “What are you saying? You just turned twenty and that’s what you say on the second month of your legal age?”

Byeong ok stared to his lover but Euigeon wasn’t laughing a bit. Euigeon’s stare pierced Byeong ok’s soul. He waited for him to laugh too, because the last line Euigeon said was just a funny joke. And that he can’t be serious at that, he’s tipsy. Theyre both a bit drunk but since Euigeon has a high alcohol tolerance then he at least must be tipsy too.

Euigeon didn’t waver. Like there was no alcohol in his system at all.

Byeong ok then climbed to Euigeon’s lap and hugged him with his ankles encircling his lover’s waist. Euigeon gently and slowly hugged him back. “You’re dead serious.” Byeong ok said

“I am.” Euigeon softly said, different from his usual deep voice. Byeong ok hugged him tighter and basked to the warmth of his lover.

“But how can we even do that though?.. its not like same sex marriage is permitted here.” Byeong ok said

“Then we’d go to other country where we could marry each other.” Euigeon said as he buried his mouth to his lover’s shoulder while speaking

“Its not that simple you know, our distant acquaintances might catch up to us and bash us like we’re some dirt that deceived them.. With internet as our friend, we’ll be in no time would be the victim of flaming rumours.” Byeong ok said as he caressed Euigeon’s head

“Hmm.. we could change our name then.” Euigeon said and Byeong ok laughed

“Really? Like wow, you seriously are a kid.” Byeong ok said “I like Ji Sung from last year’s drama by the way, I think it would be good to rename ourselves with some popular actors, so they wont search us immediately.” He followed jokingly

Euigeon separated with a bit of distance to talk to Byeong ok face to face. “What about foreign names? Should I take on foreign names then?” Euigeon brightly said

“Foreign names? Like what?” Byeong ok frowned a bit

“Daniel. I want Daniel.” Euigeon said as he smiled

“Don’t tell me it was because it’s harry potter actor’s real name?” Byeong ok deadpanned said that made Euigeon burst into laughing finally. Byeong ok just smiled at the sight of his bright lover. Byeong ok leaned in again to the embrace of Euigeon.

Euigeon snuggles to his warmth again “We’re gonna change our name for real so we need to get ready tomorrow, Yoon Jisung.”

“Oh sure, my Kang Daniel. Cant wait for tomorrow.” Jisung said

They weren’t drunk that bad. Its just a bit but they didn’t go what had they planned for this supposed day. Byeong ok didn’t talk regarding that until later in the night where his Daniel called him Jisung. They both think deeply at what they decided from yesterday. Its not even a day as Daniel fully decided on it and Jisung immediately accepts. 

They pulled it off within less than a month and theyre now Jisung and Daniel. Legally.

 

___________

 

Daniel had a close relative in Canada, and as of that coating their dreams, he planned to move there with Jisung after he and the latter finish their military service. They decided to work first to save money that they will use to go there.

Daniel didn’t know that their plan would be put on hold for the last chance of debuting on a rumoured season two of a survival show. Jisung begs the company to let them join the show as his token of departure from their company. The company permitted him to join the show with other trainees. Of course Daniel also joined on the act of his last attempt being an idol.

He didn’t much expected anything from it, he thought that if he would appeal then he would be on the last position to the finals. He didn’t expect to get the center position, the top one. And that Jisung would also succeed to enter wannaone. He was thankful that they had reached their dreams he thought they could never. They were happy until it all dawned to them later. They are supposed to celebrate with Jinwoo, Jaehan and Taewoong. A few glass of soju and Jisung spoke of his uncertainty and guilt.

That same night was the worst night of them all because they decided to break up. Jisung tried to explain to Daniel as clear and gentle on why they need to end it. Jisung was crying, his mind was full of guilt and fear. Daniel who was not willing to do so ended up agreeing by the sight of his tortured lover.

They both find it hard to adjust to their new status. They cant help getting jealous of small skinships the one shared with other members. Or any action that was too inviting for the eyes of each other. Only to remember that there wasn’t ‘us together’ anymore. The best remedy was to not look to it but sometimes once its too much, their eyes was bounded to the scenery and be hurt not to be able to protest against it.

 

_______________

 

“Ya, why Jisung and Daniel were apart from each other like its normal? We cant separate that two before when we’re hanging out.” Jaehan asked as he looked to Jinwoo and Taewoong practicing a new choreo 

“Well, you want to broadcast they were ex-lovers?” Jinwoo said as he repeated another dance step looking to Jaehan through the mirror

“Of course they need to hide, theyre like, the real thing after all.” Taewoong added while immersing himself to dancing.

“Is that why Daniel was saying that Jisung was like his his mother?” Jaehan asked again lowering the phone on his hand

“Idiot, you want Daniel to say Jisung was like a wife? You knew before a mother, became a wife first, nothing new with a bratty Daniel lurking in his good intentions.” Taewoong said

Jaehan nodded like a confused man but understood it. “Well, he’s young so, he can get a little possessive.. maybe.”

“Dude, you see how Jisung wore Daniel’s shirt? I bet Daniel coaxed him into wearing it, they have tons of clothes for fucks sake.” Taewoong said again like he expected the conversation, staring to his image in the mirror

“You think theyd get back together? After all the fame theyre having?” Jinwoo asked all of a sudden.

“I dunno, didn’t Daniel asked us to help him stage the proposal he planned after the survival show although its quite far?” Jaehan answered and asked

“Nah, they broke up that night after the show ended, didn’t even have given the young boy a chance to speak.” Taewoong said. 

Its quite sad, from their view as their close friends. They didn’t even expected it would turn that way. Sometimes responsibility and sincerity are a bitch that you need to hurt yourself in order to show the honesty everyone was expecting. Silence enveloped the practice room. Jaehan didn’t replied back but instead browse the internet with his phone again with two distinct name as the key. Jinwoo and Taewoong get back to focus as the song looped to beginning.

 

_______________

 

It was the day before Jisung’s birthday that he just remembered. He was supposed to propose on this day to Jisung before his hyung’s actual birthday. They were so busy that he didn’t remember until the exact day came and his mind wondered why the day has special space to his mind like he waited for this day to came. Daniel searched for a small box hidden inside his cabinet. He slowly opened it and pick up the small ring with his thumb and index. He looked at it with longing as he slowly spun it. He angled it forward like there was an imaginary hand in the air of that certain someone. It was long before he smiled unto his own ridiculous action.

“What is that?” Seongwu said as he finished taking a bath and entering their room again

Daniel slightly jerked from shock but proceeded to put the ring back again to the small box and stood up to hide it on his cabinet. Seongwu followed Daniel’s action with his eyes while his hands was busy drying his hair with a towel. 

“Is that the ring you were supposed to use to propose to Jisung?” Seongwu said as he figured out

Daniel looked to Seongwu’s direction with a bit of sulking and menace. The last thing he need right now is someone to splash it all over his face. Seongwu laughed as he understood why Daniel was staring like that.

“Come on, don’t worry too much, I’m sure you’ll be together in the future after all this.” Seongwu said as he dropped his towel to his own bed

It’s a pain in the ass to have a bestfriend like Seongwu. One minute he was cheering and then another minute he’ll teas—

“Unless, Jisung fall out of love, after all, Minhyun was like—perfect.” Seongwu said as he ran to their door out of their room, a pillow that flew a little bit too late smashed to the closed door.

Daniel sighed as he slumped to his own bed. He looked to the cabinet once again before he dived to his bed and covered himself with his blanket. If there was a thing that can console him into calmness and peace, it was none other than sleep.

Right now theyre not a thing more than a member of the group. He doesn’t have any rights to Jisung at all. Like a prayer, Daniel promised that when the day came that theyre freed from all of this, he’d go all out to have Jisung by his side again. After that thought, he passed out like a light, drifting to the dreamland.

 

________________

**Author's Note:**

> ________________
> 
> So, its quite ridiculous right? xD but then I need to write it out and get this out of my head or else I’ll continue webbing this., It was like a building story within the facts, hahahaha im so sorry. 
> 
> The title was supposed to be ‘Silent predator’.. if that doesn’t ring a bell this was supposed to be more angsty on how Daniel struggle with his jealousy, rated M for the scenes and E again for shamelessness xD (I cutted the overbearing moments)


End file.
